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It is still here, and I am still here. Sometimes, like these times, I get swept into a maelstrom of seemingly endless focused work hours and no sleep, and the last thing I feel like I can do is get on a computer when I finally set the work computer down for a two or three hour trifling doze of dreaming about work. Between overload and overtired, it almost took me down this time, to the depths, but MKL proved his wonderfulness again…when I called him, choice in hand, and said, “I need you to talk to me,” he didn’t ask what was wrong or why I needed this or what he should talk about. He just talked, about his day, about a phone call to his parents, about S3’s new car. Just talked. And listening to his deep, comforting, seductive voice talking about normal things that happen in lives when you have a normal amount of hours to live a life, made me choose to empty my hand and look forward to the prospect of holding his. It’s a strange thing, not living in the same house as a married couple (and yes, we’re working on it…we have a new plan.) We are not bound by the day-to-day battles over clean kitchen tables or piles of laundry or car parts, but we have made a point of identifying what our individual triggers are, and strategized on how to make it good for each of us. We’re being grown up about it. But now we are getting impatient, and more lonely for one another, and as sad as that sounds, it is a good thing. Adventures are in the offing, and I have so much to say. For now though, I may have half a day to breathe, and then back into the thick of the fray, so I thought I’d pop by to say hello. And bring you some flowers.

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Lafayette, Colorado.

Quote of the day: “I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something. So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.” — Neil Gaiman (one of my favorite authors)

Daily gratitudes:
The golden hem of the sunset’s slip against the black mountain’s silhouette
Lights reflecting out of chrome and steel windows
My head on MKL’s shoulder
My boss reading me a poem an old campfire poem – “The Shooting of Dan McGrew”
My fuzzy moose robe that feels like a hug from my husband
A dinner of Merlot and a lavendar bath

 

 

Bullying of any kind. Against LGBTQ people. Against people of different religions. Against people of differing political views. Against people of other races. Against people of other cultures. I stand against bullying and mockery of any and all humans.

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Asheville, North Carolina.

Quote of the day: “If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse, and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.” — Desmond Tutu

Daily gratitudes:
A beautiful day
Coffee with MKL
Progress
Regrouping and determining next steps
Joy’s pictures of puppies at the beach

I have somehow unconsciously decided to pay tribute to those lost in the insanity and hatred that lies behind terrorism by commemorating this kind of tragic day with an orchid. Here is today’s offering. As the parent of gay children, I recognize that it can be a challenge to accept at first. But my children are powerful, beautiful individuals who will make positive differences in this world. And that is what matters. Hatred, whether it takes the form of vile words, religious justification, or acts of violence…. I was going to say doesn’t matter, but it does. It matters deeply. The actions of one man last night effected the lives of countless others. Who really gives a damn who or how a human being loves, as long as they DO love, and spread that message of love and caring as far and wide as the world itself? My heart hurts for Orlando, for the victims, their friends and families whose lives will never be the same. But do not stop being who you are, and do not stop voicing your love and support. Otherwise, we will be doomed to repeat our mistakes ad infinitum. Rest well, loved ones, and know that we who still draw breath on this earth and have love on our side, will not stop fighting the fight for you. And we will fight it with love and understanding, not violence.

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Denver, Colorado.

Quote of the day: “We can either emphasize those aspects of our traditions, religious or secular, that speak of hatred, exclusion, and suspicion or work with those that stress the interdependence and equality of all human beings. The choice is yours.” — Karen Armstrong

Daily gratitudes:
Birds
A few days at Cottonwood
A heightened awareness of what is wrong
MKL
Cleaning up for Kelsea
That Cheryl and Pete are ensconced on Anegada

I’ve been quiet of late. Kelsea was home for a few days, which was beyond wonderful. Thanksgiving was awesome, thanks to my darling husband. Christmas is one of my favorite times of year in terms of the energy of joy in the air, so it brings lots of poignant memories. As we also approach the anniversary of my Mother’s passing, my mood turns inward and indigo. With all the pain of violent acts in our world recently that seem to be stacking up like firewood, my heart hardly knows where to turn. And so I give you another orchid. An orchid for peace. I promise that I’ll perk up and share some fun memories of Christmases past.

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Asheville, North Carolina.

Quote of the day: “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” — Mother Teresa

Daily gratitudes:
Ginger-hair
Bookstores
Kisses
Cuddly blankets
That Kelsea will be home again soon
The shadows that leafless trees cast against brick walls

 

Prayers tonight for San Bernadino.

 

A departure from the serious nature of recent posts. Not that the world and its events are any less serious, but I think that sharing beauty is a gentle reminder of love. And a little stillness in life is never a bad thing.

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Anna Maria Island, Florida.

Quote of the Day: “And when two people understand each other in their inmost hearts, their words are sweet and strong like the fragrance of orchids.” — I Ching

Daily gratitudes:
Coincidences
My Physical Therapist
The shop cat at The Happy Beast
Women with mermaid color hair
Inexplicable tears

Photo Title: Orchids and Lace

Cheyenne, Wyoming

Quote of the day: “Sooner or later we have to learn to let go and allow the changing mystery of life to move through us without our fearing it, without holding and grasping.”  —  Jack Kornfield

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